DISCLAIMER: I
don't own these characters; they belong to Warner Brothers and Shoot the Moon
Productions. I am merely borrowing them, and promise to return them when I am
done. I do, however, own this story, so please don't redistribute it without my
permission.
AUTHOR: panda
RATING: PG
with a *happy* tissue warning!
SETTING: Takes
place 4 years after the show ended.
SYNOPSIS: Lee
and Amanda welcome a new addition.
AUTHOR'S
NOTES: This story is a purely *emotional* look at the prospect of Lee and
Amanda bringing a baby into their relationship. I am not arguing whether they
would, or would not, have a baby, nor am I trying to explain how it would
affect their lives. So, ignore all those questions for now, just read and
enjoy! Thanks to my beta-readers for helping me polish this story - you know
who you are!
BELOVED ONE
The pain
shoots through my back and sides, the muscles cramping tightly. Gasping, I try to breathe. Why does this
have to get harder with age? Feeling
the contraction subside, I relax momentarily, knowing the reprieve will be
short-lived.
Feeling him
squeeze my hand, I look up into his eyes. I know this is harder on him. I have
been through this before, after all. Seeing his worry, I smile, trying to
reassure him. He is so protective of me - he can't stand to see me in pain,
even for this.
The tightening
begins again. Focusing on the picture of the boys on the nightstand, I breathe,
panting through the contraction. Leaning forward, I feel his hand pushing into
the small of my back as he tries to ease my pain. Feeling the tension subside, I lie back to rest, knowing I'll
need my strength later.
I am getting
closer. I know this without all of the fancy tubes and wires and equipment. When
did childbirth get so complicated? I'm
aware that my age puts me at risk, and for Lee's sake I agreed to the monitors,
but I refused the offer of drugs. I didn't need drugs with the boys. I can do
this.
************
"Lee, the
doctor called today," Amanda said, a mixture of emotions crossing her
face.
"Oh? What
did she say?" Lee asked, grasping his wife's hands tightly in his own.
"She said
it's safe. I'm perfectly healthy and my hormone levels are fine. We can try for a baby anytime," she
said, smiling as his face lit up.
"Well,
Mrs. Stetson, no time like the present." He swooped her up in his arms and
carried her, laughing, up the stairs to their bedroom.
************
She is so
brave. How do women do this? I can see the agony cross her features, yet she
doesn't complain. In between contractions, my eyes seem irretrievably drawn to
the threep, threep, threep of the fetal monitor. To see my... our... baby's
heartbeat on that little screen is mesmerizing.
I feel her
squeeze my hand tightly, painfully, just as I see the peak of a new contraction
displayed on the monitor. I have watched in fascination as the peaks have
gotten higher and closer together. This is a long, hard one - I can't feel my
fingers.
She relaxes,
releasing her grip on my hand, and I shake the feeling back into my fingers. I
glance again at the monitor. Threep, threep, threep. What does the baby feel, there inside her protective cocoon? Is
she in a hurry to join us, or does she resist the inevitable descent into our
world?
Returning my
attention to Amanda, I offer her more ice chips. Eagerly she takes them, her
parched lips relishing the moisture. She has never looked so beautiful. That
she would do this for me, for us, astounds me.
************
"Lee, I
need to stop at the drugstore on the way home. Do you mind?" she asked,
trying to keep her features from revealing her excitement.
"Huh? Oh,
sure, no problem," he replied absently.
"Lee?"
she asked, disappointed at his reaction.
"What,
Amanda?" He looked up from his computer screen, for the first time noticing
her face. She looked excited, scared, happy and nervous, all at the same time.
"What is it? Do you feel okay? Are you sick?"
"No, not
sick. Just... late." This time apprehension won over, giving her features
a worried look.
"Late?
What - Oh, my God, Amanda! Do you mean what I think you mean? Are you - are we
- pregnant?" He jumped up from his chair and rushed over to her, taking
her into his arms in a crushing embrace. Pulling back, he looked into her
tear-filled eyes, his own eyes also betraying a hint of moisture. Bending down,
he kissed her tenderly.
Gaining
control over her voice, she said, "Now, Lee, it's not certain yet. Let's not get carried away."
"I'm
sorry, Amanda, I can't help it. I don't remember ever feeling this way before.
You have made me so happy." Beaming down at her, he continued, "Let's
go. I'm ready to stop at every drugstore between here and Arlington, if
necessary."
************
Gasping, I
feel the pain subside. Looking up at my husband, I tell him to go get the
nurse. I remember this overwhelming urge to push. I will wait for the nurse to
check me before I give in to the urge, but I'm not sure how much longer I can
wait.
I wince at the
slight pinch as the nurse examines me. I know what the nurse will say. The urge
to push is so strong now... my body is ready. Nodding as the nurse tells me I
can push with the next contraction, I look over at Lee. The worried expression
on his face is almost comical.
Reaching out
my hand, I pull him over to me. Kissing his hand, I look up, smiling my
reassurance. I tell him everything is okay. The baby is strong, I am strong -
we can do this. We will do this.
************
"Tick,
tick, tick," the timer echoed in the confines of the room. Had ten minutes
ever lasted so long? Sitting together on the bed, watching the timer, holding
hands, they waited. No words seemed adequate.
Abruptly, the
timer dinged. Jumping in unison, the two glanced nervously at each other.
"Do you
want to look?" she asked.
"No, I
think you should look," he replied.
"Why
don't we both look?" she suggested, her liquefied limbs holding her captive.
"Um,
okay. We'll both look," he acquiesced, his stomach vying for position in
his chest. Standing, he pulled her to her feet.
Holding hands
and creeping into the bathroom, they stopped in front of the sample-laden
vanity. Looking at the neat row of specimen cups and indicator sticks, they
stood, stunned, as the meaning of what they saw registered.
"Oh, my
gosh - " Amanda gasped quietly.
"Oh, my
God - " Lee blurted.
" - we're
pregnant!" they exclaimed in unison.
************
Holding a damp
cloth to her forehead, I'm amazed at her stamina. It seems like she's been
pushing for hours. I glance at the clock and realize only fifteen minutes have
passed. Seeing my gaze, the doctor chuckles and tells me to relax - we're
almost there.
Threep,
threep, threep. The fetal monitor registers a strong fetal heartbeat. The baby
is holding up better than I am, I realize as I feel my racing pulse. The
contractions are registering nearly on top of one another - each one giving
Amanda another chance to push our daughter out into the world.
Hearing the
doctor tell Amanda that it's time to push again, I shake myself out of my
reverie. Reaching out to help support her back, I watch as she sits up,
straining, sweat plastering her hair to her forehead as she prepares to push
once more.
************
"Lee!
Lee," Amanda whispered furiously.
"Hmm?"
he mumbled drowsily.
"Lee, the
baby's moving," she whispered, reaching across the bed for his hand.
Pulling his hand over, she placed it on her abdomen, holding it in place as she
waited to feel another kick. "There, did you feel it?"
"Oh, my
gosh, Amanda! That's incredible," a fully alert Lee whispered excitedly.
Leaving his hand in place, he waited breathlessly, until he felt another nudge
against his palm. Grinning like a simpleton, he reached over and kissed his
wife tenderly on the lips. "Mrs. Stetson, that is absolutely the most
exciting thing I've ever felt in my life. Thank you."
Tears forming
in her eyes, she smiled back at him. "You're going to make a wonderful
daddy, Lee Stetson," she replied, snuggling against his chest as she
drifted back to sleep.
************
The pain tears
at my insides. I feel as if I'm trying to push out more than just a baby. I
don't remember it hurting this much.
Pausing, I am
vaguely aware of Lee's sounds of encouragement, but his words don't register. I
must push again.
************
"There,
do you see it? That's your baby, growing nicely," the ultrasound technician
stated as she ran the probe over Amanda's swollen abdomen.
"Look,
Lee, the baby's sucking its thumb!" Amanda exclaimed.
"Do you
want to know the sex?" the technician asked.
"Oh, my,
I don't know. Lee, what do you think?" She looked inquiringly at her
husband.
"Well, I
think I'd like to know, but only if you want to," he answered, grinning at
her.
“Oh, why not?
It's kind of exciting. I couldn't have known with the boys, I never had an
ultrasound with them. And I've been so convinced that this one's a girl that it
would be nice to know if I'm right. Better to find out now than after I've
decorated the nursery all in yellow," she said, grinning back at him.
"Well,
Mrs. Stetson," the technician said, "you have good instincts, this baby
is definitely a girl."
"A girl,
did you hear that, Daddy? A girl." Amanda sighed at the thought of her
big, strong husband bouncing a baby girl on his knee. "Lee?" she asked
again, turning her face from the ultrasound screen. Seeing the tears in his
eyes, she smiled tenderly at him, squeezing his hand tightly.
************
I hear the
doctor say the baby's head is crowning. Glancing into the mirror, I gasp as I
see the top of the baby's head appear. Then, slightly alarmed, I watch the head
disappear from view. I look questioningly at the doctor.
The doctor
tells me not to worry, that this is normal. The next push should deliver the
baby's head fully. Looking down at Amanda, I tell her we're almost there. She
doesn't seem to hear me; I know she's near exhaustion.
************
"Well,
Lee, don't you think it's time we discussed baby names?" Amanda asked, as
they lay cuddled together in bed. The swelling of her abdomen was so
disproportionate to her small frame that she seemed to be further along than
her eight months.
"I think
we should name her Amy," he replied.
Looking at her
husband in surprise, she said, "I didn't know you'd even thought about
this, Lee. When did you decide on Amy?"
"Well, I
did some research into your name. Did you know 'Amanda' means 'one that must be
loved' or 'lovable'?" he asked, pulling her more tightly into his embrace.
"I think
Mother told me that, years ago. Why?"
"I looked
for other names that mean the same thing. The name 'Amy' means 'beloved one',
which is exactly how I feel about our daughter," he finished, caressing
his wife's abdomen. "So, I think it fits. What do you think?"
"Oh, Lee,
I like it very much. But what about the name I picked?"
"What
name is that?" he asked.
"I
thought it would be nice to name her after you." Seeing his skeptical look,
she continued, "I really like the name 'Leanne' for a girl. What do you
think?"
"Well, my
'lovable' one, how about we name her Amy Leanne?"
"Yes, I
like that. I like that very much," she replied. Moving her hand down to
her abdomen, she said, "There you have it, baby girl, Amy Leanne Stetson
it is."
************
Push...
1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10... Lee's voice counts. The baby's head is out. The doctor
says to stop... Stop? I can't stop! Lee's voice says they need to suction the
baby's nose. I understand... I stop.
Schloop,
schloop goes the aspirator. I can push again, push... 1-2-3-4-5... the baby's
shoulders are free... 6-7-8-9-10... the rest of the baby is free. The pain is
gone. Finally. I'm tired, oh, so tired.
************
"Lee!
Lee, I think it's time," she said, shaking her sleeping husband.
"Hmm,
what, Amanda?" he mumbled, rolling over.
"Lee,
it's time. Get up, please," she said, more urgently this time.
"What?"
he asked, her words suddenly registering. "It's time! Oh, my God."
Amanda watched
in amusement as her husband leapt out of bed, stumbled into his jeans, and
practically fell as he pulled his shoes on. "Lee, we have plenty of time
yet."
"Oh, no,
Amanda. I'm not taking any chances. I don't want to have to deliver my baby in
the car on the way to the hospital. Let's go," he said, picking up her
overnight bag and practically dragging her from the room.
Laughing, she
followed his frantic form as he rushed down the stairs ahead of her.
***********
I watch in
amazement as the tiny, bright red, bundle of baby comes into the world. Her
tiny, angry screams reverberate in the small room. I smile, thinking how
healthy she sounds.
Kissing Amanda
on the forehead, I see her close her eyes in exhaustion. You did it, Amanda,
you did it! Nervously I take the surgical scissors from the doctor, trying not
to shake as I cut the umbilical cord. I watch the doctor deftly tie it off. Our
baby is still screaming, quite angry at the world.
I watch as the
team of doctors and nurses check my tiny daughter's Apgar scores. Wailing,
squirming, and her skin a healthy pink, they give her a rating of eight. The
nurse weighs and measures her. She is a strapping seven pounds, four ounces,
and is twenty inches long. The nurse places her in a diaper, puts a pink knit
cap on her head, wraps her in a blanket and places her on my wife's chest.
Opening her
eyes, Amanda looks at the writhing, noisy bundle on her chest and smiles a
heart-wrenching smile. God, how I love this woman. She asks the doctor if she
can nurse the baby. Seeing the doctor's nod, she looks over at me, asking if
I'll hold our daughter while she gets ready.
I nod, tears
wetting my cheeks as the nurse transfers the baby to my arms. I look down at her - her wide-open mouth -
her eyes squeezed shut - her tiny nose. Lifting her cap, I see a mass of dark
hair atop her slightly pointed head. Amazed, I feel her fingers close around
mine. I count each one. I count her toes, too. I am astounded at the miniscule
nails adorning each one. How does one cut such tiny nails?
Hearing Amanda
say she is ready, I carefully hand our daughter to her. She deftly places the
baby's open mouth over her exposed breast, the resulting quiet almost
deafening. Smiling, I watch the baby make sucking movements with her jaw as her
tiny mouth emits slight slurping noises. Looking at my beautiful wife, new
tears brimming in my eyes, I say, "I love you, Amanda Stetson."
She looks at
me, a smile of utter joy and contentment on her face as she says, "I love
you, too, Lee Stetson. We did good."
"Yes, yes
we did. We did very good." I look tenderly at my suckling newborn baby
girl. "Welcome to the world, Amy Leanne Stetson," I tell her as the
tears run unabashed down my cheeks. "I love you, too."
THE END
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