THE NEW AVENGERS

QUOTE PAGES

"TO CATCH A RAT"

 

GAMBIT: Steed can you tell me about this incident in Istanbul? Devilish clever use of the garlic sausage.

 

PURDEY: I was just trying to remember what I was doing 17 years ago.

GAMBIT: Eating Marshmallows probably, you haven’t changed a bit. Well, maybe a bit, but the right bit.

 

PURDEY: It was a Wednesday I think…yeah…and my parents took us boating and this awful man came up to me and said…

GAMBIT (distracted): How about here?

PURDEY: He certainly did not!

GAMBIT: I meant how about here for going round and round?

 

PURDEY: What about you 17 years ago?

GAMBIT: Me? I was discovering sex.

PURDEY: What a waste of time, you might have been learning to drive.

 

AFTER COMING TO A STOP IN THE RANGE ROVER

PURDEY: That’s better. I mean, going round and round is quite nice but it loses its enchantment after a bit. (Looks over at Gambit) Anyway, from what I hear, you’ve already been around quite a bit.

GAMBIT: Been at keyholes again, Purdey?

PURDEY: It’s common knowledge in the department.

GAMBIT: Just hearsay.

PURDEY: The typing pool affair?

GAMBIT: Rumour.

PURDEY: The undersecretary’s undersecretary?

GAMBIT: Jealousy.

PURDEY: The Russian countess, so called?

GAMBIT: Ah, yes, well…um…that was an undercover job and I took them literally.

PURDEY: What do you mean?

GAMBIT: Under…cover (Purdey just stares at him) ‘Undercover’.

PURDEY: (Tuts and looks away) Let’s go round and round again.

 

AFTER BURSTING INTO A CHURCH WITH GUN POINTED ONLY TO SEE TWO WOMEN ARRANGING FLOWERS

PURDEY: Take your hands off me you brute! You can’t make me do it. I’ll never marry you, never! I hate you.

PURDEY RUNS OUT AND LEAVES A SHEEPISH LOOKING GAMBIT TO GULITILY PLACE MONEY INTO THE COLLECTION BOX BEFORE GOING OUT TO JOIN HER AT THE CAR…

PURDEY: Quick thinking, eh? I got us out of a tricky situation without any embarrassment.

GAMBIT: No embarrassment, no embarrassment at all. Probably happens all the time, they’ll think no more of it.

 

STEED: You see my position Minister? I must suspect everyone. My recurring nightmare is that one day I might even have to arrest myself.

 

PURDEY: You’re dying to know aren’t you? How I knew about the scar on Cromwell’s leg.

STEED: Well, it was rather high up.

PURDEY: You’re just bursting with curiosity aren’t you?

GAMBIT: Frankly, yes.

PURDEY: Well…(stage whisper) a real gentleman doesn’t ask a lady a question like that. 

 

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